


Am I Worth It?

by Mintstream



Series: Penny Parker; Whumptober 2020 [5]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Female Peter Parker, Gen, Hurt Peter Parker, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Parent Tony Stark, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:01:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26911825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mintstream/pseuds/Mintstream
Summary: Tony is gone, dead. But Penny won't accept that, not when there were powerful magical stones just left lying around for her to use.Day 9: “Take Me Instead”| “Run!”| Ritual Sacrifice
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Penny Parker; Whumptober 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1940167
Comments: 14
Kudos: 124





	Am I Worth It?

**Author's Note:**

> uh, no lie, i did cry writing this. rip

Penny wasn't quite sure what to do. What to feel. It'd been a crazy week, though technically five years. Five whole years, in which she'd been gone. In which Mr. Stark had gotten married. And had a kid. A family. She'd been gone, and now he was gone too. He was gone. Her mentor was dead, killed saving the universe. Saving his family. His family he'd left behind to save her. At least, that's what Mrs. Potts had said.

When Happy had driven her and May--who had been so doting and so teary eyed after missing her during the Blip--up to the quaint cabin that she would have never imagined the man to live in, the woman had taken her aside before the service had started, taking her to Mr. Stark's old workspace. It had been the only space in the house she really recognized as Mr. Stark.

DUM-E sat in the corner, beeping excitedly at the sight of her and Mrs. Potts, there were old mugs still littered everywhere, doomed to collect dust until anyone got the courage to move them. There were some projects laying around, projects that would never be finished, and a framed family photo on every table and on all the walls. There were even a couple of her.

The sight made her tear up, and it was all she could do the not break down crying, instead choking down the sob that had gotten caught in her throat. Mrs. Potts placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, pointing at one desk with a small metal disc on it.

"He...he left a message for you," she said softly, "Feel free to take it, and join us whenever you're ready."

The widow left, padding out of the door lightly, and Penny wondered at how she was so composed. Mr. Stark had been closer with her than she had been with him. And yet she was the model of poise. Sad poise, for if you looked close enough, you could tell there was a tremble in her step and a waver in her voice.

She wished there was some way she could fix this. Some way that Mr. Stark would get to stay with his family. That his family would get to keep him. And, selfishly, she wished she'd get to keep him too. But he was gone. Gone like her parents and gone like Uncle Ben and gone like she wished she was.

Penny shook her head of the thought, forcing herself to take halting steps towards the disc on the table. She pressed the small button on top of it hesitantly, flinching back as a blue light flashed out. She blinked, and suddenly Mr. Stark was in front of her. Well, sort of.

He looked different than when she had known him. For one, he was slightly blue and glowing, but his hair was also lighter, with streaks of gray. His goatee less sharp, his demeanor softer than when he'd been alive. Than when she'd been alive. This time she couldn't stop the tears that dripped down her cheeks.

"Hey, kid," Mr. Stark greeted, and she sobbed, placing a hand over her mouth, "Hope you're not having too much fun without me. Hm, uh, that probably wasn't the right thing to say, but I don't know if there ever will be the right last thing to say to you. I certainly couldn't come up with anything--anything then, but maybe I can do a little better now." The memory of Mr. Stark in front of her tried for a smile, his eyes slightly teary, "A lot has changed, as you can tell. Pepper and Morgan... I'm blessed to have them, kiddo, beyond blessed actually. But you deserve to be here. Every day this world turn without your bright eyes...it's a curse. I don't know much of what to say, Pen, other than that I love you."

She took a sharp intake of air.

"I love you, kiddie. And I miss you, a lot. When Lang came parading in here with this _stupid,_ absolutely _hairbrained_ plan about going back in time and fixing everything, well, I turned him down. I can't lose what I've gained. But I couldn't stop thinking about what I'd lost either. This, uh," he pointed a finger at his head, spinning it in circles, "--never ending little that just kept repeating _'What if?'_ What _if_ I could save you? What _if_ you could be safe, and alive, and happy? It was too much to just, _let go._ So, I didn't."

"I don't know how long it's been," her mentor carried on, beginning to gesture at the space around him, "But I had the resources, I had the brains, I just needed to have the heart. And, well, _I did it!"_ His voice was excited, almost like a child's as Mr. Stark turned around from the workspace to look back at her, but their eyes didn't reach, and her vision began to blur with tears, "I got time travel down in a cinch, kid. Though it's a bit more annoying than the movies would have you believe."

She huffed out a laugh, mumbling, "Have you ever _watched_ a time travel movie?"

But Mr. Stark carried on as though she wasn't there. Because she hadn't been.

"I've gotta be honest, I don't know if this will work, Underoos. If I'm lucky, it will. And if I'm even luckier, I can delete this message. Throw it away and just..." he trailed off, closing his eyes for a moment as a deep sadness passed over his face, "Penny, I just need you to know, that I love you. And try not to grieve too long, a month or two, maybe. There can't be _no_ tears." She laughed, "And--and that I wouldn't have done what I done, if I hadn't known you were going to be here."

Penny paused at that. Mr. Stark had done this...for her? But...why? Why risk so much when he already had a family? Why risk so much when he was already safe, and alive, and happy? _Why?_

The hologram stopped in front of her, and she readjusted herself to look him in the eye. There was too much too unpack in his face. Too much sadness, and love, and joy and...and just _everything._ And she didn't want him to go. She didn't want him to leave. She couldn't do this without him. May had never even wanted a kid anyway, so why--

"I love you, Pen, and look after Morgan for me."

And as Mr. Stark faded away, his hologram filtering back into its desk, she was overcome by an overwhelming urge. Determined and stubborn and set.

He'd look after Morgan himself.

* * *

There was something Penny had been aware of since the car had pulled up to the cabin. Since the portal had opened back to earth. Since the threat of her now nightmares had appeared on a rusty, barren planet. And that was power. She hadn't been quite sure what it was until she'd seen Mr. Stark use them.

The Avengers had called them Infinity Stones, and Friday had confirmed of their reality bending powers. If they could bring back half the universe, why could they not bring back Mr. Stark?

The teen's senses had been aware of the Stones ever since she'd walked up the driveway, tingling up her spine. She hadn't felt like this from where she'd been staying at the tower in Manhattan, so the stones must be here. Something about 'time travel' and 'returning order' had caught her attention from Mr. Rogers and Mr. Wilson, so she assumed they must be using Mr. Stark's time machine here to return the stones after the funeral. If she could just grab them when they weren't looking, snap her fingers and then...then Mr. Stark would be here.

Maybe she wouldn't, but Mr. Stark would be.

Penny waited as guests filtered in, faces she did and didn't recognize filling the yard in a blurry wave of indifference. She'd focused in on the case Mr. Rogers had been carrying, her senses directing her towards it almost intentionally. She just had to wait.

And she didn't have to wait long.

Mr. Rogers ended up taking the case upstairs, and she listened as he locked it in Mrs. Potts's bedroom and then headed back downstairs. Nobody acknowledged the man as he came back down the stairs nonchalantly, as if he hadn't just left the most powerful items in the universe in a very easy to break into bedroom.

Well, better now than never.

Excusing herself to go to the bathroom, she hurried upstairs as not-suspiciously as she possibly could (which, given her charisma, wasn't great), and somehow managing to get to Mrs. Potts's bedroom without being stopped or questioned. The girl stopped outside the door, grabbing the handle, and hoping that no one would mind _too much,_ broke the handle.

The door swung open lazily as the metal splintered in her hand, allowing her access to the room. The air still and heavy, she pushed the door open, flinching when it squeaked, and holding her breath, she walked in.

The case sat on the bed, unguarded, and with every step her senses grew stronger, her body more tense. Biting her lip, she flipped open the case, barely holding back a gasp at the glowing stones. A humming began at the back of her school, taunting her, as if the stones knew her presence. Knew her motivations.

Penny didn't know why, but the golden stone is the one that caught her attention, it's thrumming the strongest. But not danger...warmth. Familiarity. Taking a deep breath and gulping, her hand flashed out and grabbed it.

And then everything flashed orange.

* * *

Penny blinked rapidly, shooting up from where she had been laying down and pausing as she looked over the empty orange landscape. She gaped at the golden sky, endlessly reflected by the water she was laying in that wasn't wet. That confused her more than anything as she waded her hand through the 'water,' only for her fingers to come away dry.

Confused, she scrambled to her feet, looking out amongst the endless orange a little fearfully. She had touched the stone and then...this? Had she done it? Was Mr. Stark okay now? Was he...was he with his family? His real family?

"Hello?" Penny called, but there was no response. She took a hesitant step forward, then turned around as her senses took charge, directing her. Behind her was...Mr. Delmar's? It was covered in the orange tint, and a little watery looking, but it was the familiar bodega, and with no other clue as to what was happening, she started towards it.

The walk felt like forever yet barely a second all at once, and it was a dizzying experience to find herself almost placed in front of the glass door. Hesitating, Penny peered through the glass, anxious to see what was going on, only to find the store exactly like it had used to be. The chips section to the front, the candy right next to it, and completely empty.

The familiar _chime!_ of the bell greeted her when she walked through the door, and the unexpected sound made her flinch violently. The silence had been so oppressing until now, and the bell reverberated through the air neverendingly, as though her ears were clinging onto the one sound other than the swishing of not water and her heart thumping in her own ears.

"Hello?" she called again, a little more desperately this time. And this time, there was a response.

"Hello," replied an unfamiliar voice. Penny's head swiveled towards the source, gaping and blinking in confusion at the little girl in front of her. She was green with reddish pink hair tied up into buns. She looked eerily familiar to Penny somehow, and she wasn't sure why.

"Oh, ah um, hi. Hello," she stuttered, and the girl's lips twitched.

"You already said that."

"Sorry," Penny apologized, "I'm confused. Are--who are you?"

"I'm the soul stone."

That broke her a little, her mind blanking, "You're--you're the _stone?"_

"Yes."

"Huh. Um, Mr. Stark? Did...is he okay now?"

The girl peered at her curiously, "He's not alive, if that's what you're asking. Yet, anyway."

"Yet?" Penny repeated hopefully, and the girl hummed.

"Yet. Life is a fickle thing, and balance is important in the universe, though Thanos understood importance, he didn't understand balance," the girl started, her meek voice strangely elegant, "As such, bringing back the lives of many others such as yourself was balance, there was no trade of equality that needed to be made. Now however, I cannot give one life without a reason."

Penny stared down at her feet, swallowing, "Take me instead."

"I cannot."

"You can and you will," Penny steeled, "Mr. Stark has a family! He has a _daughter,_ who needs him more than anything! No one needs me! They'll--they'll miss me, but I was already gone for five years...and they were fine. Take. Me."

The girl stared at her curiously, "Anthony does not wish for you to take his place."

"I don't give a rat's ass! I'm taking his place here."

"Why?" the girl asked.

"Why? Why not!? Mr. Stark's always been so nice to me, he spent and he sacrificed so much for me, just for me to _always_ throw it in his face or--or ignore his orders and make his worst nightmares come true! He saved the world, and he deserves to be with his family."

"And what of your family?"

She deflated a little. She didn't want to leave May alone again, but she couldn't leave that little girl without her father, "They got on fine before, they can do it again."

"We'll see," the girl said, staring at her, and then she smiled and waved her hand before Penny could say anything else. The orange overwhelmed her again, and when she blinked through the haze, Delmar's was gone and in its place was Mr. Stark's lab.

"What the...?" she trailed as she turned slowly around the achingly familiar room. She froze, her voice breaking, "Mr. Stark?"

"Kid," he greeted, sounding equally broken as he stared at her, "You're not supposed to be here, Pen."

"You're not either."

Mr. Stark just stared at her, his gaze forlorn, a tear slipping from his eye, matching the ones running down her own face. It was Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark was standing in front of her, and he was going to go back. She'd make sure of it.

"Yes, I am, Pen. I made that choice."

"Well I'm making a different choice," Penny argued. He wasn't allowed to stay here. She'd make sure of it.

"No, you're not. You're going home, and you're going to take care of yourself, and May, and Morgan--"

_"You_ need to take care of Morgan!!!" Penny practically yelled, and Mr. Stark's eyes widened in response, "That's _your_ job! She's _your_ daughter! And she needs you, not me. She needs her dad, not some recently revived teen her dad used to mentor. You can't stay here, Mr. Stark."

"And you can't either," he responded softly, making his way around the tables towards her until he was right in front of her. She couldn't stop looking at his eyes, how sad they looked, and she could only imagine how angry hers were.

Mr. Stark wrapped her in a hug, pressing his noses into her hair. Penny froze for a moment, but then melted, burying her face into his chest and breathing deeply for the first time since she'd been back.

"Don't go, Mr. Stark. Morgan needs you... _I_ need you," she begged.

"I know, kid. God, _I know._ But I can't go back, and I would rather die a thousand times over than have you trade your life for mine. Okay?"

"No."

_"Penny--"_

"No, Mr. Stark. You can't--you can't stay here, I won't let you! I'll make some sort of deal with that soul person and--"

"Penny!" he cut across her, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her slightly, "You _cannot_ do that. I'm old, I've lived my life and I made my choices. I regret a lot of them, but I don't regret what I did. Because it saved you. And it saved Morgan, and you get to keep on living."

"I can't, Mr. Stark," she cried, "I can't lose you. _Please."_

Mr. Stark placed a kiss to her forehead, "And I've already lost you. Go back to Earth, I'll be here when it's time. And that better be another good seventy years from now."

"Why, this is quite entertaining."

Both she and Mr. Stark turned at the new voice, looking up to see the little girl from earlier practically beaming at them. She looked interested and intrigued at she and her mentor, as though they were a strange and unusual sight to see.

"Now, Penelope, remember what I said about trading and reason earlier?" the Soul Stone asked, and she nodded dumbly, "The trade doesn't have to be a life. Sometimes it just has to be emotion--overwhelmingly so--something which I always find fascinating among the many souls I harbor. And if I left it up for you two to decide, we'd be here a few millennia."

Penny blinked, "So, you're--"

"Sending you back," the Stone answered, and with a wave of her hand and a smile that glowed, orange was all she saw once again.

* * *

Penny was back in Mrs. Potts's bedroom, and she was no longer alone. Mr. Stark knelt on the ground next to her, looking around in bewilderment, clearly catching his breath.

"What. Penny--"

She interrupted him by throwing her arms around him, "You're okay! You're okay, you're okay, you're okay, _you're okay!!"_

"Yeah, I'm okay," he reaffirmed, and then he laughed, pressing another kiss to her cheek and hugging her tighter, "We're okay... But never do that again."

"Sacrifice yourself again and I might," she laughed wetly.


End file.
